Doctor Love: Dating While Autistic
Welcome back everyone! This week, as you can already guess by the title, we are going to dive right back into the world of dating while Autistic!! (hollywood scream). I know that last time we all thought it would be over. That all that could be said, was said. Will, no, actually. Because it’s such a difficult terrain for us to cross, and because we don't already have enough fear and stress in our lives (especially me), I feel that we can always learn from others who have crossed that dangerous line. Coming out on the other side unscathed, physically anyways, not sure emotionally.
Everyone please welcome our next guest, from northjersey.com, Amy Gravino or, as she calls herself, Dr.Ruth of the Autistic community. What is she the doctor of? Will, love apparently. Doctor Ruth is working on a memoir, documenting her adventures in the dating world as a woman with Autism, hoping it will provide insight to others who are also on the spectrum and dating or will date. What are some of the tips that lie within the book? Let's take a look-see.
I see in my future: commitment, demands, mother and-or father in laws, and expectations. Will, maaaaybe being single is’nt sooo bad.
Try not to come out to strong, lest you chase away your prey. Telling someone you like them after just meeting them is not the best idea, it “puts a lot of pressure on that person” (northjersey.com, paragraph 3. https://www.northjersey.com/story/news/essex/montclair/2018/04/27/dr-ruth-autistic-community-amy-gravino-talks-love-dating/533360002/). Rather, it’s best if you just give it some time. Also, Doctor Ruth mentions that it seems to be sadly normal for Autistic men to be seen as “stalking”, when all they are really being is either friendly, romantic, or romantically friendly. As an Aspie male myself, I suggest we try the tactic of being a friendly romantic, just to see.
Fun fact, according to the article: ASD affects approximately 1 child for every 68. In New Jersey in particular, it is 1 for every 38, according to the Federal Centre for Disease Control and Prevention (funny how such a thing is done by an organization known for fighting deadly disease like cancer and the like. Nothing says “Autism is a terrible thing, and those that have it are dangerous” than have it called a disease that needs to be prevented and controlled. This is normalization, but not the kind we want).
Next week, we will continue looking at the article by northjersey.com, continuing to swim the terrifying, and often very difficult, waters of the dating world and Autism. They say there are plenty of fish in the sea, but with the prevailing attitudes towards us one tends to wonder what's better: kissing the fish, or cooking, sauteing, and eating them for a fancy supper (or be humane, and catch and release). Until than, this continues to be, the Audacious Aspie.
Unless they are sharks, than run. Or better yet, just don't sail in waters that contain sharks, unless your in a cage, attached to something that can bring you back up to the surface, and have nothing left to live for.
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