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To disassemble the stigma of mental health and join together in solidarity, unity and proud display of our human vulnerabilities, Community Discussion Sessions will facilitate connection and collaboration among and between all populations.

Community Discussion Sessions further support the disassembling of the mental health, illness and addictions stigma, through open conversation and education.

Within Community Discussion Sessions, I hope to provide:

• walk-in discussion groups for individuals of different marginalized populations,
• therapy dogs to support individuals during discussion groups and activities
• group discussions and activities to increase discussion and allow people creative expression in showcasing their ‘reality’ – their vulnerabilities
• guest speakers to spur discussion on breaking down the mental health stigma as well as resiliency – and how individuals in different marginalized populations could work to achieve said resiliency.

If you are interested in hosting a Community Discussion Session for a certain group, I can send you an overview of what the Community Discussion Sessions entail and we can work together to tailor them to a specific population or group, or to a specific mental health difficulty your population faces, if you would like. Please contact me for further info!

 

TheoryOfLove - a project started by Carleton student Daniel P. to increase conversation surrounding mental health - & Jack.org Carleton University Chapter, along with support from the CUSA Womyn's Centre are proud to collaboratively present 'Respecting Gender,' a TheoryOfLove Mental Heath Community Discussion Session, on April 3, 2018 at 8:30pm, at Rooster's (4th floor University Centre at Carleton University, held respectfully (as respectfully as possible, given the circumstances) on unseeded Algonquin territory. 

Come one come all! 

Community Discussion Sessions are based on transparency and expression of the vulnerabilities which we all face, but don't often feel comfortable expressing. In this Community Discussion Session, come embrace your vulnerability, and the collective vulnerability of your peers, in the discussion of how mental health infiltrates the challenge of gender and formulation of our gender-identity. 

Suggest questions and topics for discussion by making your contribution to this Google Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1sQIyuOD3bXp_BMc7MABOf-hfTz0vGwSKJsYT33AVlQo/edit?usp=sharing.

If you have any inquiries please do not hesitate to reach out to [email protected]. 

We hope to see see you on April 3rd! 

• TheoryOfLove 
• Jack.org Carleton
• CUSA Womyn's Centre

Come discuss mental health and join the movement in disassembling the mental health stigma. We all face challenges -- we all feel vulnerable and insecure from time to time, but we don't often talk about these insecurities. 

Transcending the social class division, Community Discussion Sessions will facilitate mental health discussion among different populations, in hopes to create a more connected and united society. Come discuss! Embrace vulnerability. 

This event is in partnership with the outstanding Operation Come Home -- they do some amazing work in terms of youth support. http://OperationComeHome.ca/

We all have vulnerabilities. 
Own them. Share them. Shout them. 

For any questions please feel free to send a message to TheoryOfLove, or email [email protected]. Collaborations definitely welcome! 

MIRROR, MIRROR ON THE WALL – THEORYOFLOVE & PEOPLE WITH VARYING ABILITIES

Historically, people with disabilities have been marginalized. We have been looked down upon by the rest of society; we have been ostracized and treated as ‘the other.’ This is because we are told by the media not to be ‘different;’ we are told to hide what makes us ‘less.’ We are told not to embrace the very fabric of what makes us unique; we are told to hide in solemn obedience surrounding our very individuality – our humanity. We are told not to show any faults, to tuck our insecurities away and only take them out when in private. We are told that the only time we truly can reflect upon ourselves is in front of a mirror. We are told not to look too closely at the reflection in the mirror, and to mold and shape and tweak our bodies to be in conformity to what is the ‘flavor of the week’ ‘out there.’

 

As humans, we crave social connection; we have an intrinsic desire to be accepted, and to feel loved and like we belong. There are very specific rules surrounding social connection which, in the mainstream, Westernized society, are carefully and strategically put forth into the public eye by the media, to carve out a very specific type of quantifiable ‘success;’ to control, truly, how people behave.

 

As such, a common feeling for people with disabilities is isolation and loneliness. When we don’t feel included, we feel marginalized. When we feel as though we don’t fit in, we feel a sense of disconnection to the world. I wrote about my feeling of disconnection to the world in my blog post here about bullying. This phenomenon is the same with seniors, and with other marginalized populations such as people who are homeless (click here to read my story on David and Miriam).

 

I have a stutter. I’ve felt its strain on my desire to be accepted — to feel love; having a stutter isn’t something that is typically attractive or something others can just forget about; it impacts how I communicate all the time. Telling jokes is not my forte. As such, I have lived in shame of my stutter for a long time, especially when I was first growing up. I felt anxious meeting new people and introducing myself — those dreaded ‘circle introductions’ always got me (and, I can assure you, still do).

 

As humans, we are meant to engage with others and be social. I have had to hide my insecurities surrounding my stutter, and the dip in self-confidence it continues to give me to this day, because we are told not to speak about our weak points.

 

I know someone who would tell everyone he met that he has challenges with social cues and with ‘socially-accepted behaviour.’ The intrinsic desire for social connection — indeed, the Theory of Love — spurred him to do this; but, alas, people backed away from him, because that ‘isn’t what you’re supposed to do.’ Rather, people weren’t comfortable with the idea of someone so openly expressing their insecurities — what they are challenged with.

 

We all have challenges; we all experience hardship and fight internal battles that make us feel weak or inadequate. It’s time we start owning them — together.

 

Share your vulnerability; something that you struggle with. It is time to get past this idea of being flawless and ‘perfect,’ especially online. Use the hashtag #IamReal to share your mental health reality.

When you look into the mirror tomorrow morning, which version of yourself will you be?

 

 

THEORYOFLOVE ON BULLYING

 

This is happening far too often. 

Bullying, that is. 

 

Everybody has vulnerabilities and we all experience insecurities. We are just taught not to talk about them, so we can fit in. Due to this desire for connection we try to mask these insecurities as best we can — this includes making others feel weak so as to overcompensate for our insecurities.

I’ve been bullied. It is hard to stay strong, Keaton. I was bullied in elementary and middle school, and in high school I sort of learned my lesson and just became one of those ‘loners.’ I was called “Daniel Germs” (not sure if both words are capitalized…never thought to ask); I was fake-invited to a party, with an invitation put in my locker and everybody crowding around and then laughing when I figured out it was fake; two guys threw pencils and erasers at me and I was too afraid to tell him to stop, so when Darragh shouted out for them to quit it I was trying my hardest to fight back tears; I was ran away from at lunch; I was bullied on MSN with a girl pretending to ask me out and making fun of me — for months; and, really, I’ve felt alone for a lot of my life so far. I am lucky to have a support system that I can fall back on, however, supports truly cannot adequately compare to the unkindness of others, I feel.

We all have an intrinsic desire to connect; to feel as though we belong — to feel loved, accepted, valued and like we matter. Further, we are told by society that, in order to fit in, we must put on a certain persona; a costume. We are told that in order to feel accepted we need to be strong: we cannot be weak.

Honestly? I’ve learned that this is garbage.

People bully because they feel little. People bully because that is the only option they have to hide their insecurities. People bully because they feel alone and because they feel as though they can’t adequately express their insecurities and how they honestly feel.

Bullying is a form of cowardice that can be solved if we take down the societal need to conform, and, specifically, conform through hiding our challenges — if we stop this ludacris survival of the fittest mantra when it comes to social connection. No: rather, how we all survive is survival of the connected; society of the collaborative. 

If we all join together and discuss our vulnerabilities, we can get to a place in society where we don’t need to belittle others to feel as though we fit in: we can fit in by owning our struggles, and bonding through them with everyone else.

The time for action is now. Make a short video discussing your mental health and showcasing something you usually try to keep to yourself. Use the hashtags #IamReal and #TheoryOfLove. 

MIRRORS

I used to spend so much time looking at myself in the mirror. Fixing my hair, putting on my makeup. It was all a facade, to mask how I really felt about myself. I couldn’t even go to the grocery store without putting makeup on first. I was afraid that I would see someone I knew and they would tell everyone my big secret; that I am just average. I was too self-centered to realize the world wasn’t talking about me when I wasn’t around.

Then I went through a few years where I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror, I hated myself that much. If I forced myself to look in the mirror it usually ended in tears. The reflection I saw was just a shell of a woman, drowning in guilt, regret and failure. A woman doomed to spend the remainder of her days in her…

 

THEORYOFLOVE

I lost my wallet for a week and had almost no cash. I really had to rashion myself.

It is way too easy to just say “fuck it, it’s not worth really trying,” and just give into your addiction. I mean, really, what else do you have in life? … What else do you have, that you can control?

What else do you have that you can call your safe haven?

What else do you have that is your escape?

Even if you do have a house and money and everything … Socializing and being part of a community – of something ‘bigger than yourself’ – is also a safe haven; a place you can find comfort and solace in.  Without that, what do you have ?

Humans,

We are social creatures.